Happy Hour Discurso

Today's opining on the public discourse.

It's Poke the Media in the Eye Day here at the watering hole. I wish I didn't have such an abundance of material to work with, but alas, our national media churns out a never-ending flood of stupidity, inanity, and just plain bullshit. If they were my treadmill, I'd be dead of exhaustion by now.

Let us begin.

If I watched the news channels, this is the event that would have caused me to give myself a home lobotomy with an icepick:

This one is truly mind-numbing, and enough to suggest a few too many political observers might want to stop sniffing glue. Obama was giving a speech, and ironically enough, commenting on the need to move beyond trivial distractions. Apparently, during his remarks, he had an itch on his face. He scratched it. This, to hear some tell it, was Obama’s way of giving Clinton a one-finger salute.

[snip]

This was not simply limited to otherwise-bored bloggers. MSNBC and FoxNews.com also treated this as a news item of note. In fact, MSNBC asserted that Obama “made an unfortunate gesture.”

I wondered what it would be next. I was plumping for the sort of toast Obama orders in diners, but no, it's cheek scratching. With two fingers, mind. And not in the British two-fingered salute manner, either, I hasten to add.

Carpetbagger's right. They do need to stop sniffing glue. And using meth.

Oh, and that ABC debate? Yeah. That one. The one that blew leper donkey dick. You're gonna laugh when you hear what their premise was:

Wednesday night, ABC broadcast a debate between the Democratic presidential candidates from the National Constitution Center, which co-sponsored the debate. The venue inspired ABC to, as co-moderator Charlie Gibson explained, "begin each of the segments of this debate with short quotes from the Constitution that are apropos to what we're going to talk about."

[snip]

Surely a presidential debate held at the National Constitution Center and featuring "short quotes from the Constitution that are apropos to what we're going to talk about" would touch on some of these issues.

Unfortunately, ABC had other ideas. The Constitution served as little more than window dressing for a debate that has been widely derided. Early in the debate, Gibson referred to a clause in the Constitution that was repealed more than 200 years ago and that wouldn't apply to the situation he was discussing even if it were still in effect. Later, Gibson asked whether a District of Columbia law prohibiting the possession of certain types of guns is "consistent with an individual's right to bear arms."

That's as close as the ABC hosts came to delving into the candidates' views of the Constitution. There was, once again, no mention of the constitutional issues raised by the current administration's actions.

One gets the sense that Jamison Foser might have been a wee bit disappointed when writing this column. Gee. I have no idea why. Mainly because Mr. Icepick is lodged nicely in Mr. Frontal Lobe, and the whole world just looks brighter that way.

Oh. It's the light reflecting off the metal. Right.

Note to ABC: you might want to read the actual Constitution. The whole thing. Not just the bits quoted by right-wing gun nuts. And not just the random Articles you picked because that's apparently where your Starbucks cup leaked. Also, there's nothing in the Constitution about flag pin lapels being a necessary test of office. Just so you know. Oh, hey, whatever happened to that one story you broke a while ago, you know, the kinda important one, it was about, lemme see, oh, yes, Bush approving torture?

Gah. Moving on.

This is why I love dday:

OK, so I should mention the results of our protest yesterday at the ABC/Disney headquarters. It went really well. Note that I had this idea
sitting on my couch at 12:00pm Thursday, and by 4:00pm Friday we had 60 or 70 people out there in Burbank. Considering that in the current age there's almost an allergy to protesting, that's not bad (especially in gridlocked L.A.), and we were able to get the word out without making one phone call.

I'll give you the AP's impression:

About 50 people rallied at Disney Studios Friday to protest the questions that ABC News journalists asked the Democratic presidential candidates during a debate earlier this week.

Protestors waved signs that read "Restore the Fourth Estate" and "ABC is TMZ," referring to the online celebrity site.

Organizer Rick Jacobs criticized ABC for focusing on the past gaffes of Sens. Barack Obama and Hillary Rodham Clinton, instead of issues like the war in Iraq and the American economy.

Today, dday is my hero. And now, if you'll excuse me, I have an icepick to remove from my brain.