*Sigh* No, Mom and Dad, I Haven't Stopped Shaving

My father gets the strangest ideas sometimes:

Your dad wants to know if you are going to stop shaving and using deodorant. He thinks you are turning into a radical "hippie”.

No, Dad. I'm none of the above. Let's parse this.


See? I still shave. Becoming a flaming liberal hasn't changed my appreciation of a smooth leg.

True, some liberals don't shave, but neither do some conservatives. Political ideology doesn't dictates one's views in depiliation. And, I assure you, deodorant remains an important part of my daily routine. One cannot expound effectively when one is stinky.

Radical is more problematic, if you separate it from the "hippie" part. I know for certain I'm not a hippie, so let's start there. According to the Free Online Dictionary, a hippie is

A person who opposes and rejects many of the conventional standards and customs of society, especially one who advocates extreme liberalism in sociopolitical attitudes and lifestyles.

I oppose and reject many of the conventional standards and customs of the radical religious right. Is it "extreme liberalism" to want the government to obey its own damned Constitution, throw out the theocons, and swing left before the entire country goes down in flames? I'd love to see universal healthcare, an end to American imperialism, an effort to clean up the environment before we've completely destroyed the place, and a little more intelligence in the public discourse. Is that such an extreme liberal position?

Why yes, yes, it is. Because according to the fuckwits in power, even John McCain is verging on "extreme liberalism." According to the political quiz I just took, I fall somewhere in the center left. But by European standards, I'm actually not very extreme at all:

The fact is, even the conservative parties of Europe are to the left of the Democratic Party in the U.S. The European political center is where the American left would love to be.

You want to know why I keep talking about emigrating? There's your answer. People start talking about thirty-five hour work weeks and oodles of vacation and social democracy and the decline of religion in Europe, and it's hard to resist temptation. Granted, they have problems. But they also have the Mediterranean.

It's really hard to say no to the Mediterranean.

But I'll stay here and throw my weight to the left and hope the country shifts. She's a grand ol' lass, despite her current difficulties. Besides, she's where I keep all my stuff. Including my razor.

I do, however, reserve the right to pack said razor and travel the world should such become feasible.