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29 August, 2008

Happy Hour Discurso

Today's opining on the public discourse.

God to Republicons: "You kids get the hell off my lawn!"

The Washington Post is reporting this morning that the Republicans are considering delaying the start of their convention because of Tropical Storm Gustav, which is expected to become a hurricane before making landfall on Tuesday. The White House is also debating whether Bush should cancel his speech or not.

Gustav is not the only problem Mother Nature is throwing at our country. Tropical Storm Hannah is out there strengthening also, and expected to become a hurricane in the next couple of days and could hit the U.S. towards the end of next week.

As if that isn’t enough, there are two more potential storms growing.

Note to theocons: if you're going to claim that God sends down hurricanes to show his wrath regarding teh gays et al, you should probably request he times things better. It just looks kinda bad when all the hurricanes skip the Democratic National Convention week and gang up on Republicons.

Global warming's a bitch, innit?

You may have noticed I didn't lead with McLame's desperate pleas for attention. That's because when you give him that sort of attention, it only encourages him to engage in even more outrageous antics. Like, oh, say, picking a creationist, global-warming-denying, polar-bear-dissing, Hillary-bashing, extreme-anti-choice, scandal-plagued, Big-Oil-soaked, foreign-policy-challenged, clueless, inexperienced, and all round ridiculous running mate simply because she goes down easy with theocons and might lure mythical Clinton holdouts with her mighty vagina:

There's a political adage that's been around for a while that says the first "presidential decision" a candidate makes is picking a running mate. If that's the case, John McCain would apparently be a very odd president.

Republican presidential candidate Sen. John McCain has chosen Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin as his running mate, NBC News has learned.

She would be the first woman ever to serve on a Republican presidential ticket. The pro-life Palin would also be the first Alaskan ever to appear on a national ticket.

Palin, 44, was elected Alaska's first woman governor in 2006.

Every network confirms it; this is the actual Republican ticket for 2008: McCain/Palin.

It's more than surprising; it's the strangest running-mate decision since Dan Quayle. Sarah Palin spent a year working as a commissioner for the Alaska Oil and Gas Conservation Commission, and has been governor for a year and a half. Now, she'll be the Republicans' vice presidential candidate, and if things go well for McCain, one heartbeat from the presidency. When it comes to being untested and unknown, Palin is in a league of her own.

Just yesterday, advisers to the McCain campaign conceded to the New York Times that McCain "thinks highly" of Palin, but "her less than two years in office would undercut one of the McCain campaign's central criticisms of Senator Barack Obama -- that he is too inexperienced to be commander-in-chief." So much for the McCain campaign's message.

Stepping back, we have the man who would be the oldest president in American history, who happens to have a record of health problems, picking a virtual unknown who's been a governor for less than two years. Amazing.

This choice comes down to two things: McCain had to do something to suck the right-wing's dicks, and he wanted to upstage Obama. Country first? Not even fucking close.

McCain's in this for his own power and glory. Like a spoiled brat drama queen, he'll do anything to make sure attention stays focused on him. He doesn't want to lead this country: he wants to become president so he can call himself President and play with all the bestest toys.

This is all we can expect from a campaign that can't even figure out basic English grammar:

They were selling this on their fucking website. You'd think that a bunch of people trying to get a man elected would have the intelligence to proofread their fucking promotional pens.

And what kind of news gets lost in the VP din? Oh, you know, nothing special. Just the deputy of McCain's most favoritest Iraqi getting arrested for bombing Iraqis and Americans:

BAGHDAD — U.S. forces have arrested a deputy of Ahmad Chalabi, who was once the Bush administration's favorite Iraqi politician, and implicated him in bombings that killed Americans and Iraqis, Chalabi and Iraqi government officials said Thursday.

The U.S. military alleged that the arrested official was working with the "highest echelons" of the Iranian "special groups" criminals, referring to what the U.S. military says are Iranian-backed militias operating in Iraq.

Ali Faisal al Lami, a Shiite Muslim official and a member of the Sadrist Party who's serving as an executive of the Justice and Accountability Committee, which Chalabi heads, was arrested Wednesday at Baghdad International Airport as he returned from a family vacation in Lebanon, Iraqi officials said. The Justice and Accountability Committee screens former members of Saddam Hussein's Baath Party who are applying for jobs in the government.

That John McCain. He's sure some foreign policy geeneeyus, ain't he?

3 comments:

  1. Republican presidential candidate Sen. John McCain has chosen Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin as his running mate, NBC News has learned. She would be the first woman ever to serve on a Republican presidential ticket. The pro-life Palin would also be the first Alaskan ever to appear on a national ticket. Palin, 44, was elected Alaska's first woman governor in 2006.

    The republican party knows if they dug up Reagan and ran him they would lose. the GW/Cheeny/Rove Cabal have screwed the GOP big time. They are not going to waste someone they think might be able to win in 4 years now, because the Dems are going to win.(Or so I hope)

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  2. Looks like they fixed the typo. Great thing about these modern swag stores is that you can change the advert without having to change any actual products.

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  3. Maybe the pen grammar is more accurate than they think... dare I hope there's that among a population picked for intelligence that there's only one student who's supporting McCain?

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