Sarah Doesn't Do Science

We all know by now that Sarah Palin is a creationist, Dominionist fuckwit. She's no fan of science, as a study in wolves proves beyond reasonable doubt:

In early 2007, Palin's administration approved an initiative to pay a $150 bounty to hunters who killed a wolf from an airplane in certain areas, hacked off the left foreleg, and brought in the appendage. Ruling that the Palin administration didn't have the authority to offer payments, a state judge quickly put a halt to them but not to the shooting of wolves from aircraft.

Why is she so eager to annihilate wolves with airplanes and high-powered rifles? It's for the moose - she claims that those big bad wolves are eating too many. Nothing to do with the sexy, faux-macho notion of flying around shooting up animals that can bring down an elk, I'm sure.

Let's see how her science holds up:

A raft of scientists has argued that Palin has provided little evidence that the current program of systematically killing wolves, estimated at a population of 7,000 to 11,000, will result in more moose for hunters. State estimates of moose populations have come under scrutiny. Some wildlife biologists say predator control advocates don't even understand what wolves eat.

Heaven forfend! People with a deep personal interest in having more moose running about than you can shake an assault rifle at not understand actual science? They couldn't possibly be manipulating the data and willful ignorance in their favor!

State officials stand by their scientific findings on predator control. "Several times over the past several years, our science has been challenged in court," says Bruce Bartley, a spokesman for the Alaska Department of Fish and Game. "In every instance it has prevailed."

See? Even the authorities say it's a spiffy plan! It's not like those officials are part of a government rotten with corruption, and it's not like those judges are appointed by the governor. Not. At. All.

My goodness. Did I just spill sarcasm all over your nice new shirt? Terribly sorry.

Let's just wipe up and move on, then.

Yet it is not hard to find Alaskans who say Palin's enthusiasm for predator control fits a broader narrative of how she edits science to suit her personal views. She endorses the teaching of creationism in public schools and has questioned whether humans are responsible for global warming.

In 2007, she approved $400,000 to educate the public about the ecological success of shooting wolves and bears from the air.

That would be Ms. "Won't Fund Programs that Help Pregnant Teens, heck, I'm So Anti-Pork I'm Practically Muslim!" Palin spending four hundred thousand smackeroos on a propaganda drop to ensure the public thinks it's ecologically friendly to shoot animals from airplanes.

"Across the board, Sarah Palin puts on a masquerade, claiming she is using sound management and science," says Nick Jans, an Alaskan writer who co-sponsored the initiative [to curtail aerial hunting]. "In reality she uses ideology and ignores science when it is in her way."

Gee. That sounds sorta like our current Disaster-in-Chief, dunnit?

Gordon Haber is a wildlife scientist who has studied wolves in Alaska for 43 years. "On wildlife-related issues, whether it is polar bears or predator controls, she has shown no inclination to be objective," he says of Palin. "I cannot find credible scientific data to support their arguments," he adds about the state's rational for gunning down wolves. "In most cases, there is evidence to the contrary."

Yup. She's a Republicon, all right. Up is down, black is white, and science is negotiable. Evidence to the contrary just means you dig your heels in harder and start shouting to drown out all those pesky facts. And so on.

Last year, 172 scientists signed a letter to Palin, expressing concern about the lack of science behind the state's wolf-killing operation. According to the scientists, state officials set population objectives for moose and caribou based on "unattainable, unsustainable historically high populations." As a result, the "inadequately designed predator control programs" threatened the long-term health of both the ungulate and wolf populations. The scientists concluded with a plea to Palin to consider the conservation of wolves and bears "on an equal basis with the goal of producing more ungulates for hunters."

Apparently Palin wasn't fazed. Earlier this year she introduced state legislation that would further divorce the predator-control program from science. The legislation would transfer authority over the program from the state Department of Fish and Game to Alaska's Board of Game, whose members are appointed by, well, Palin. Even some hunters were astounded by her power play.

First, do some dumbfuck thing that science proves is directly opposed to your stated objectives. Second, ignore all the scientists who dump fourteen tons of irrefutable evidence on your doorstep that proves you're dumbassity. Third, hustle your pet legislation as far away from that icky science as you can get. Fourth, move programs out of the hands of reasonably independent goverment bodies and into the hot little mitts of your personal political ass-lickers.

My gods. No wonder McCain chose her. She's a bloody expert at being a typical neocon hack! Ready to destroy the country on Day One, she is - no training necessary.

Says Jans, co-sponsor of the losing initiative [to outlaw aerial wolf hunting]: "This is a reflection of a somebody who doesn't have any use for science."

You're not kidding.