Happy Hour Discurso

Today's opining on the public discourse.

On the seventh anniversary of the War on Terror, let's have a substantive discussion about war and foreign relations, shall we?

Oh, fuck, who am I kidding? These Republicons can't have one. Let's have a discussion about Republicon inanity instead.

Let's start with our head honcho war guy, George "Fuck 'em All" Bush:

While serving as CentCom commander between March 2007 and March 2008, Adm. William Fallon consistently pressed the Bush administration for more engagement with Iran and criticized the calls for another war. “This constant drumbeat of conflict is what strikes me which is not helpful and not useful,” Fallon told al Jazeera last year.

In his new book “The War Within,” Washington Post journalist Bob Woodward details a telling White House meeting on Iran in spring 2007 (p. 334):

“I think we need to do something to get engaged with these guys,” Fallon said. Iraq shared a 900-mile border with Iran, and he needed guidance and a strategy for dealing with the Iranians.

“Well,” Bush said, “these are assholes.”

Fallon was stunned. Declaring them “assholes” was not a strategy. Lots of words and ideas were thrown around at the meeting, especially about the Iranian leaders. They were bad, evil, out of touch with their people. But no one offered a real approach.

No. No one offered a real approach on Iran, and no one offered a real approach on Iraq - not that Monkey Boy George and his cohorts would listen to - and hence the dangerous mess we find ourselves mired in today.

Let's continue our saga with John "Bomb 'em All" McCain:

On the morning of the 9/11, just moments after the World Trade Center collapsed from the terrorist strikes, Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) went on television and immediately began focusing the nation’s attention on Iraq. In an interview with CBS’ Dan Rather on 9/11, McCain said:

To be honest with you, Dan, I never thought that an operation of this sophistication and size would take place. I just never did. But I don’t think there’s any doubt that there are countries — Iraq, Iran, Libya, North Korea and others — who we know engage in proliferation of — of capabilities and, from time to time, involve themselves in state-sponsored terrorism. But never did we imagine on a scale such as this.

The next day, on 9/12, McCain reiterated the point in an interview with Chris Matthews. “It isn’t just Afghanistan,” he said, “we’re talking about Syria, Iraq, Iran, perhaps North Korea, Libya and others.”

Because attacking every country in the world is going to do such wonders for our country. McCain may have temporarily fought in Vietnam before getting himself shot down, but he apparently didn't absorb a few important lessons, such as: the more fronts you fight on, the less fucking likely it is you'll succeed.

And Sarah "I Learned Foreign Policy by Osmosis!" Palin thinks we need to bomb more than just scary brown people:

ABC News reports, "On the anniversary of the worst terrorist attack in U.S. history, Gov. Sarah Palin took a hard-line approach on national security and said that war with Russia may be necessary if that nation invades another country":

Palin advocated the accession of Georgia and Ukraine into NATO, meaning that if attacked again in the future, the United States would be bound to go to war.
"I mean, that is the agreement when you are a NATO ally, is if another country is attacked, you're going to be expected to be called upon and help," she said.

So. Entire Middle East, much of Asia, and now Russia. Is there anywhere these people don't want to bomb?

This is what passes for serious foreign policy: kill 'em all, and let God sort 'em out. Seriously. And these fuckwits think this nation has the will, the resources, and the warm bodies necessary to singlehandedly defeat at least half the world.

I'm emigrating if these idiots get elected. But it may not do any good - they'll probably decide that Australia's been looking at America funny, and the bombs should start falling...