Every semi-knowledgeable moviegoer and reader of movie criticism knows what the words "not screened for critics" means: The movie is a
dog.
"Not screened for critics" means a movie is so terrible that the studio will take its chances, deprive itself of free publicity, and go without release-date reviews. Considering the garbage the studios will show us
critics ahead of time (such as the gruesomely lurid "Street Kings" or the laughably stupid "10,000 B.C."), to keep a movie away from critics is usually a sign that things are really, really bad.
That's Sean P. Means with the Salt Lake Tribune, telling it like it is. I don't think I've ever been this delighted reading something out of that newspaper. It's actually the first time I've read anything in that newspaper, but that's beside the point. I sure as shit didn't expect a writer in one of the most conservative states in America to excoriate Expelled. Then again, I've lived right on the Utah border, and I can tell you that, conservatism aside, quite a few folks in Utah are pretty adept at putting 2 and 2 together and coming up with "wait just a darn minute..."
Sean is very good at smelling a stench and identifying a rat:
Now, I have no idea whether "Expelled" is a good movie or a bad one. Like a good critic, I will reserve judgment until I actually see the thing. But I can't help but be struck by the irony of Stein's own words in the movie's introduction (which is also on YouTube):
"In my experience, people who are confident in their ideas are not afraid of criticism. So that tells me the Darwinists are afraid. They're hiding something."
What, pray tell, are Stein and the "Expelled" producers hiding? And what are they afraid of?
Just so, Sean. And I can tell you exactly what they're afraid of: intelligent folk who do their research (the body of the article sniffs around the antics of the Expelled Clown Crew, since they wouldn't let him get within a mile of the actual film). Intelligent folk like you, who have a public forum in which to say: "The movie is a dog."
Something tells me that April 18th is not going to go at all well for these assmonkeys.
3 comments:
It's going to do very well at least in the short term. There are millions of people in the country with a political/religious reason to see the film regardless if it's good or not. Passion Of The Christ was a blockbuster despite the fact that it was just a Christian splatter flick.
It'll also have a long life on DVD - there are a lot of church youth groups in the country.
Besides, as Mencken said; "No one ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public." It explains the very existence of the Republican party in its present form.
Dana: Thanks for the shout-out. Yes, there are pockets of blue even in redder-than-red Utah. Salt Lake City even elected, twice, a mayor who demanded the impeachment of George W. Bush. (Google "Rocky Anderson" sometime, then step back from your computer.)
BTW, I, too, hail from the great Pacific Northwest - Spokane, precisely, with five years in Seattle at the U-Dub.
*blush* You're welcome, Sean! You deserved no less, and actually a great deal more for such a great review! Next time you're in the Pacific NW, give me a shout!
George, darling my love... thank you for mitigating the shattering of my hopes by quoting Mencken! Crap, was he ever right...
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