It's two pages of spectacular right-wing nuttery. When a Con gets a few talking points lodged in their skull, they can't get them out with a crowbar and a blowtorch. One of those talking points is that it's never the Con's own fuckwittery to blame: it's always those horrible librul special interests!
I suppose we are indeed a "liberal special interest." We are liberals, and we have a special interest in keeping batshit insane wingnuts from getting reelected.
Last Friday, all the liberal special interests from California to Vermont found a new outlet for their energy, their frustrations and their money. That would be in defeating me.
She went on to whine that we know nothing about her policy views (au contraire), her opponent's views (well, the fact he's running against Rep. Bachmann speaks volumes, but strangely enough, so does his campaign site), and that we're only riled up because of "a few minutes of listening to the political echo chamber" (no, Michele, this was just the final straw).
But that's not the pièce de résistance of her mélange de folie. No. The best part is her blatant attempt to change reality:
Despite the way the blogs and the Democratic Party are spinning it, I never called all liberals anti-American, I never questioned Barack Obama’s patriotism, and I never asked for some House Un-American Activities Committee witch hunt into my colleagues in Congress.
Michele, I hate to break this to you, but there's a video.
Let's have a gander at the transcript, shall we? We'll start with the anti-American bit:
Parsing your phrasing, Michele, you did indeed just call liberals anti-American. You don't have to say the exact words, "Liberals are anti-American," to say that liberals are anti-American. The entire thrust of your conversation was to call everyone who isn't ultra-conservative "anti-American." And although you tried to walk it back, give yourself some plausible deniability by pretending you were only talking about "radical leftists," you made it pretty fucking clear that anyone not right of center is close enough to a "radical leftist" to qualify as "anti-American" in your estimation.
MR. MATTHEWS: If you have liberal views, does that mean you have anti-American views? What's the connection? I don't get the connection. What's the connection between liberal and leftist and anti-American?
REP. BACHMANN: Anti-American is the point, because --
MR. MATTHEWS: I mean, if you're liberal, are you anti-American?
REP. BACHMANN: Well, the liberals that are Jeremiah Wright and that are Bill Ayers, they're over-the-top anti-American. And that's the question that Americans have. Remember, it was Michelle Obama who said she's only recently proud of her country. And so these are very anti-American views.
MR. MATTHEWS: Well, let me ask you this. This country is roughly divided now over the last -- all our lifetimes between Republicans and Democrats and liberals and conservatives. Maybe 30 percent of the country, 30 to 40 percent, is conservative, and self- described -- people tell you what they are -- and 30-some percent are liberals. Do you think those 30 percent liberals are anti-American? The 30 percent of this country that calls itself liberals, are they anti-American?REP. BACHMANN: I think the people that Barack Obama has been associating with are anti-American, by and large, the people who are radical leftists.[emphasis added]
Moving on to questioning Barack Obama's patriotism, we find that you did indeed do so. There's the associates-with-anti-Americans schtick, and don't fucking tell me that's not questioning his patriotism, because we all know that "true patriots" don't "associate with people who are anti-American." Right? And then there's this precious little exchange:
REP BACHMANN: I think that it's important that the American people know that Barack Obama didn't have a mild association with Bill Ayers. He had a very strong association with Bill Ayers. Bill Ayers is not someone that the average American wants to see their president have an association with.
MR. MATTHEWS: Why is it of concern? What is wrong with it? Tell me what it tells you about Barack Obama. Does it say he's got a character problem? Does it say he has a problem with his patriotism? Just give me a term for it so we can put it in a category. Why do you care enough to bring this up at the end of this campaign? Why is it an important election eve issue?
REP. BACHMANN: I think it's important, Chris, because --
MR. MATTHEWS: I mean, we've got a lot of problems in this country. Why is this so important that it's being pushed out on telephone calls to all the key states now with two weeks to go?
REP. BACHMANN: It's important because we look at the collection of friends that Barack Obama has had over his life, and usually we associate with people who have similar ideas to us. And it seems that it calls into question what Barack Obama's true beliefs and values and thoughts are -- his attitudes, values and beliefs with Jeremiah Wright on his view of the United States --
MR. MATTHEWS: Okay --REP. BACHMANN: -- which is negative; Bill Ayers, his negative view of the United States. We've seen one friend after another.
You want to tell me again you're not questioning his patriotism? Bull. Fucking. Shit.
Now, what's this about you not calling for a witch-hunt?
Coup de fucking état.
MR. MATTHEWS: Well, he's a United States senator from Illinois. He's one of the people you suspect as being anti-American. How many people in the Congress of the United States do you think are anti- American? You've already suspected Barack Obama. Is he alone, or are there others? How many do you suspect of your colleagues as being anti-American?
REP. BACHMANN: What I would say -- what I would say is that the news media should do a penetrating expose and take a look. I wish they would. I wish the American media would take a great look at the views of the people in Congress and find out, are they pro-America or anti-America? I think people would love to see an expose like that.
Keep El's new seat warm for him, and do remember to disinfect the office on your way out, you lying sack of shit.
(Tip o' the shot glass to zizi at Daily Kos. And an extra shot for the exquisite contempt!)