18 December, 2008

Dumbfuck Religious Predictions Watch

I'm usually not the kind of person who breathlessly anticipates stars having babies, but I'll be eagerly awaiting the day when Nicole Kidman sprouts another bump:
While promoting her new film 'Australia' on German television, Nicole Kidman broke an Aboriginal taboo against women playing the didgeridoo. Kidman played a weak note on the tradition Australian instrument while appearing on the show "Wetten, Dass..?" with fellow star Hugh Jackman, and the Aboriginal community is not taking it lightly.

"People are going to see Nicole playing it and think it's all right," Aboriginal language teacher Richard Green told the Sydney Morning Herald.


Kidman gave birth to her first natural child, Sunday Rose, at 41. According to Aboriginal wisdom, her didgeridoo gaffe guarantees she won't have any more. Richard Green claims, "It bastardises our culture. I will guarantee she has no more children. It is not meant to be played by women as it will make them barren."
I wonder what inane excuse Mr. Green will pop up with when Nicole proves him stupid?

(And yes, I know it's culturally insensitive of me, must respect native traditions, blah blah. But if patriarchal bullshit can be derided in the world's major religions, I fail to see why we shouldn't also point and laugh at the he-man woman haters in all religions. Just because they're rare doesn't make 'em right. Or, as Terry Pratchett's Commander Vimes once put it: "Just because someone's a member of an ethnic minority doesn't mean they're not a nasty small-minded little jerk.")

1 comment:

Wayne said...

Good to see your tapping our local rags. You might like to browse 'The Australian', I can recomend Phillip Adams' regular column and his ABC national radio program 'Late night live' it's right up your ally. His regular guest Bruce Shapiro keeps us up to date on the absurdities of American Politics and his left wing satire keeps me rolling in the isles. Keep up the good work, WWW