04 August, 2009

WND Exclusive: Real Fake Birth Certificate Proves Obama Born in Kenya!

Man, the WorldNut Daily's on some kind of roll, here. First, they prove beyond all unreasonable doubt that Obama is, in fact, the Antichrist. Now they've got refutable proof he was born in Kenya, too!
Last week, Hawaii's health director apparently checked the president's birth certificate again, and discovered that Obama was, in fact, born in Hawaii on Aug. 4, 1961, and "is a natural-born American citizen." A nutty right-wing website, however, produced an obviously-fake document purporting to show that Obama was born in the "Republic of Kenya" in February 1964.


WorldNetDaily and the right-wing fringe are very excited about their scoop that Orly Taitz has "released a copy of what purports to be a Kenyan certification of birth" for President Obama. According to WND, "Taitz told WND that the document came from an anonymous source who doesn't want his name known because 'he's afraid for his life.' " So in order to believe Taitz and WND, one would have to assume that this document was requested 45 years ago, preserved that entire time, withheld through the entire election and transition period, and yet somehow ended up in the hands of someone sympathetic to Orly Taitz.

DailyKos' David Waldman has identified what appears to be an even more glaring problem with WND's latest smoking gun. The document posted by WND purports to have been produced by the "Republic of Kenya" on February 17, 1964. But Kenya didn't even become a republic until December 12, 1964. An article from that day's Washington Post, for example, reported that "Kenya became the newest republic within the British Commonwealth at midnight."

There are, of course, just a few other itty bitty problems with the totally authentic fake certificate:

Yet some people persist in casting suspicious glances at the document. User CatM in the comments:

First, the hospital is Coast Provincial General Hospital (sometimes said to be Coast Province General Hospital), not Coast General Hospital.

Second, Kenya was a Dominion the date this certificate was allegedly issued and would not become a republic for 8 months.

Third, Mombasa belonged to Zanzibar when Obama was born, not Kenya.

Fourth, Obama's father's village would be nearer to Nairobi, not Mombasa.

Fifth, the number 47O44-- 47 is Obama's age when he became president, followed by the letter O (not a zero) followed by 44--he is the 44th president.

Sixth, EF Lavender is a laundry detergent.

Seventh, would a nation with a large number of Muslims actually say "Christian name" (as opposed to name) on the birth certificate?

Eigth, his father (born in 1961) would have been 24 or 25 when he was born and not 26.

Ninth, it was called the "Central Nyanza District," not Nyanza Province. The regions were changed to provinces in 1970.

Old Redneck in a recommended diary (omitting duplicates from above):

  1. The document is dated 5 August 1964 -- a Saturday. From what I can find, Kenyan guvmint offices close early on Friday and are closed on Saturdays. Oooops [...]
  1. This piece of paper certainly looks nice and new to be 45 years old -- unless the Kenyans were using acid-free paper back in 1964. Heh, heh.
  1. Finally, Officials of Coast Province General Hospital reported: “We do not have computerized records going back to the 1960’s and can only sort through our archives by hand,” Dr. Christopher Mwanga, an administrator at the Mombasa hospital tells GLOBE. “We have searched for all the names of babies born on Aug. 4, 1961, and have not found the name of Barack Hussein Obama. That is all I can tell you.”

Dr. Mwanga is clearly in on the scam.

Oh, Kos, you're so right! He's totally part of the anti-Birther nefarious Obamabot forces of reality! So is the Aussie whose certificate was apparently used as the template:

One of my friends in the small community of Obama “birther”-debunkers passes on quite the discovery: a 1964 “certified copy of registration of birth” from Australia, easily available on Bomford.net, a genealogy site. There are striking similarities between this document and the one Orly Taitz is passing off as a “Kenyan birth certificate” for Barack Obama.

- The design is identical, down to the seal at the top and the classifications (”Christian name,” etc) used for identifying the baby.

- The “registrar” on the Bomford document is G.F. Lavender. On the Taitz document, it’s E.F. Lavender.

- The “district registrar” on the Bomford document is J.H. Miller. On the Taitz document, it’s M.H. Miller.
And all the skeptical Birthers who decended upon such an obvious forgery and bemoaned Taitz's dumbfuckery - Obama plants, all of 'em! It's all some nefarious plot to tear the Birther community apart from within!

Not that they need any help when they're so damned good at doing it to themselves:

This is a woman Ann Coulter calls a crank. You know you're a batshit fucking insane freak when you're not a liberal and yet Ann Coulter calls you a crank. Of course, it's also rather obvious you're an insane fucking freak when you submit a bloody obvious forgery as evidence to the judge.

But don't worry, Orly. Michele Bachmann's still your friend!
She's like a really insecure and needy teenage girl looking for validation, going so far as to announce to the world when famous people sign up as her Facebook friends. No, seriously.
10th Member of Congress, Michelle Bachmann, MN signed up as my friend on Facebook

And that followed the 9th member of Congress to do so. And a guy from the Heritage Foundation. It's all so exciting. I'm on pins and needles waiting to find out who invites her to the prom.

Judging from the way she looks in the video, we might have a long damned wait. Then again, these people are nuts...

But hey, let's be charitable here. Maybe this is just their fucked-up way of saying, "Happy Birthday, President Obama!"

Of course, around the cantina, we like to keep things simpler:

And a good laugh. Many happy returns, Mr. President!


Chris said...

If you really want to take a ride down into the abyss of insanity, google "birthers", take some Dramamine, fasten your seat belt and pull the lever. This morning I read an excellent article on the subject by Eugene Robinson, who mentioned among other things that a whopping 28% of Republicans don't believe Obama was born in the U.S., while 30% "aren't sure". Folks that's over half of the Republican rank and file! For whack jobs like this, getting around a 49 year old Honolulu newspaper birth announcement is mere child's play. Nothing, and I mean nothing, better confirms that the Republican party has voluntarily excluded itself from any rational discourse on public policy.

Efrique said...

The "Bomford birth certificate" link is b0rken. I followed it to see which kind it was (different in each state), out of interest, since mine is from a year earlier and I wanted to see if they were similar.