The Brunswick County school board is looking for a way for creationism to be taught in the classroom side by side with evolution.
"It's really a disgrace for the state school board to impose evolution on our students without teaching creationism," county school board member Jimmy Hobbs said at Tuesday's meeting. "The law says we can't have Bibles in schools, but we can have evolution, of the atheists."
Yes, you fuckwit. That's because evolution isn't a fucking religion - it's science. Not that you would know what science is. Fucking morons.
What the fuck is wrong with these people? Why do they seem to believe they had to be there to personally witness events over millions of years before they're valid? And did this dumbass ever consider the fact he wasn't here 6,000 years ago, either? Let me ask you a question, Joel: if God is such a badass, why aren't we seeing him babbling from burning bushes now? I haven't personally seen Jesus in the flesh: therefore, he must not have ever existed.
The topic came up after county resident Joel Fanti told the board he thought it was unfair for evolution to be taught as fact, saying it should be taught as a theory because there's no tangible proof it's true.
"I wasn't here 2 million years ago," Fanti said. "If evolution is so slow, why don't we see anything evolving now?"
See how that cuts both ways?
Not to mention the fact that evolution is fucking everywhere. Joel could step into any bloody biology lab in the country and watch evolution happen right before his god-blind eyes. The only thing not evolving is the fucking creationists.
Let me save you the time and expense: you can't do it. No way, no how, no creationism.
Board attorney Joseph Causey said it might be possible for the board to add creationism to the curriculum if it doesn't replace the teaching of evolution.
Schools' Superintendent Katie McGee said her staff would do research.
Babson said the board must look at the law to see what it says about teaching creationism, but that "if we can do it, I think we ought to do it."
You know what I think an easy solution to this is? Make these fuckers pay. Instead of the schools having to foot the legal bills for yet another hopeless attempt to replace science with fundamentalist Christian bullshit, make the dumbfucks who propose this crap pay for the pleasure. If school board members were personally on the hook for the expense, some of them might not be so eager to tilt at windmills. Even if not, at least the money would be coming out of church pockets (because you know they'd take up a bloody collection). Schools shouldn't have to pay for creationist stupidity.
(Tip o' the shot glass to Tristero)