07 May, 2010

Dumbfuckery du Jour

Every Con in this country needs to be put in a remedial class on the Constitution.  They obviously don't understand it.  Take Lindsey Graham, for instance, who joins the chorus of bleating buffoonery:
In today’s Senate Homeland Security and Governmental Affairs Committee hearing on “Terrorists and Guns,” and Sen. Lindsey Graham (R-SC) said he wholeheartedly agreed with his colleagues and wanted to write legislation that would allow authorities to deprive them of their rights: 
GRAHAM: I want to stop reading these guys their Miranda rights. Me and Peter are so much on board here.
Graham was on active duty in the Air Force as a Judge Advocate General, the corps that acts as legal advisers to the U.S. military. He is now in the Reserves and serves as a Senior Instructor at the Air Force JAG School. In light of his role, it’s disturbing that he would be so willing to distort what Miranda rights are and call for getting rid of them in certain instances. Graham and his conservative counterparts are under the mistaken impression that Mirandizing a suspect grants special rights, when all it does is inform someone of existing rights. As Matt Yglesias adds, “And the whole reason cops mirandize suspects is that if you don’t, you risk having your evidence thrown out of court. If you gather all the information before mirandizing, you could be throwing the whole thing into doubt.”
But, of course, the Fourth, Fifth and Sixth Amendments don't mean jack diddly shit to these dumbfucks.  When they talk about the Constitution, adhering to it and honoring it and how inviolate it is, I believe they have only two amendments in mind: the Tenth, of course, because they're under the mistaken impression that it allows them to ignore the federal government when they're being required to do icky things like treat teh gayz like humans and provide health care to disgusting poor people.  And I think you can all guess the other amendment they worship:

Sen. Frank Lautenberg (D-N.J.) has been pushing a bill that seems pretty reasonable -- if you're on the FBI terror watch list, you should be ineligible to buy weapons in the U.S. Law enforcement has long supported the proposal, but Congress keeps rejecting it.

The Senate Homeland Security Committee held a hearing on the subject yesterday, and as Gail Collins noted, it didn't go well.
"I think you're going too far here," said Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina at a hearing of the Senate Homeland Security Committee on Wednesday. He was speaking in opposition to a bill that would keep people on the F.B.I. terrorist watch list from buying guns and explosives.
Say what?
Yes, if you are on the terrorist watch list, the authorities can keep you from getting on a plane but not from purchasing an AK-47. This makes sense to Congress because, as Graham accurately pointed out, "when the founders sat down and wrote the Constitution, they didn't consider flying."
The subject of guns turns Congress into a twilight zone. People who are perfectly happy to let the government wiretap phones go nuts when the government wants to keep track of weapons permits. A guy who stands up in the House and defends the torture of terror suspects will nearly faint with horror at the prospect of depriving someone on the watch list of the right to purchase a pistol.
Sen. Susan Collins (R-Maine) said, "Let me emphasize that none of us wants a terrorist to be able to purchase a gun." She then proceeded to explain her opposition to a bill that would prevent those on the terrorist watch list from purchasing guns.

The NYT's Gail Collins added, "There seems to be a strong sentiment in Congress that the only constitutional right suspected terrorists have is the right to bear arms."
I really don't understand these people.  And my head has hit my desk with such force I'm unable to come up with anything more to say than "ZOMG WTF ow."

Bonus dumbfuckery: the cognitive dissonance between shrieking about teh evil guvmint ramming itself down throats while cheering on the imposition of a police state explained.

1 comment:

Woozle said...

So... maybe if we start "framing" human rights in terms of gun rights, that will get through to the Right.

How about this: introduce legislation that will guarantee 2nd Amendment rights (oh, and all the others as well, but put that down near the end) to all detainees. Any opposing conbot can be attacked as "trying to take away our guns!"

Or how about a law that anyone who has been read their Miranda rights has the right to purchase a gun if found innocent? Maybe they'll short-circuit themselves trying to figure out whether they're virulently for or against that one.